By Daniel Becerra

To honor Ian’s excellent article on Simple Ways To Become More Attractive, I will follow up with Part 2 of it. These ways of becoming more attractive are as simple as the former, but they are just different. The thing is that both are simple to establish, but also simple to neglect. This list should enable you with tools to connect both sides and achieve results if you haven’t gotten them yet. You may have noticed that you were encouraged to exercise, educate yourself, sleep appropriately, work on your manners, and so on – and while what you get by following this lifestyle is great, what you become is actually greater. In other words, what you become is greater than what you get, and I don’t mean just looks-wise, I mean ’spiritually-wise’.

Count Your Blessings, Not Your Misfortunes - An  attitude of grattitude is the first step for altitude, and dating too. It is easy to fall into the trap of focusing exactly on what we don’t have, this leads to endless sense of un-achievement. Of course, if you’re focusing on what you don’t have, you will never have enough. But amazing it is, that when you’re grateful for what you have, you often get more of it in nicer, bigger proportions. Not to count the positive attitude that will be radiating from you at all times. Let me give you an example, rather than complaining about your 5 extra-inches belly, be thankful for the fact that you have food to eat, while others don’t, and that you have the ability to use your legs, arms, and brain to exercise, while others don’t. When you take five to ten minutes of your day, everyday to become grateful for what you have, you often (not always by the way) will go out with a positive attitude, and as a consequence, achieve more.

Help others achieve what they want - It was the master motivator and sales guru Zig Ziglair who said “You can get enough of what you want if you just focused enough on helping other people get what they want”. Great women appreciate a man with a good heart as much as they appreciate a man with intelligence. I first saw evidence of the latter when I started dazzling people I knew for a long time when they heard me speak intelligently, and furthermore, write intelligently. Months later came up the former. I started getting involved mentoring kids, doing small workshops to donate to charity and so on, and sure enough many more girls admired this. The principle of helping others achieve what they want is not just related to charity or helping others but to your very interactions with others in social scenarios. Women go out to have fun and even though, they know some disrespectful guys will come by, they hope that it’s minimal, so if you can just be the guy who can help her achieve that piece of mind by making her smile and be genuinely interested in who she is, then you too will be helping her achieving what she wants, and as a result she will find herself more attracted and comfortable to you.

You’re not perfect - Absolute vulnerability is the most desirable strength, yes? What does this mean? It means having courage and a strong enough backbone to stay a man not only when things are all good and fun, but also when things are ugly and complicated, especially if it’s wholly or partly due to you. It means to admit your mistakes. Admit your jealousy. Admit you’re not the best at one thing. Admit this is not ‘your night’. Admit that you can be grumpy at times. Some people may expect you to be perfect, but those people are doomed to be disappointed for life. In this world, we need to get used to imperfection. It’s the only thing there is! Intelligent and higher level people understand that we are humans and vulnerable to mistakes, so if you admit them, you will become more human in their eyes, and as a side effect, more attractive and desirable.

Laugh at yourself – This goes hand in hand with admiting your mistakes and using humor for greater success. Smile at yourself and your silliness. If you make a silly mistake, don’t try to cover it up and become perfect. Laughing at yourself only adds more confidence to your level of attractiveness, this means, of course, becoming even more attractive. This doesn’t mean “sabotage yourself” or “Talk-down on yourself”. It simply means having enough confidence to smile at your silliness. Consider throwing lines such as “I can’t get it up” or “I’m only this good looking on Tuesdays”. When you begin to smile and laugh at yourself, then not only will the others admire you and find you more attractive but also they will model you. Soon enough you will…

Have them laugh at themselves - If you can laugh at yourself, then they can laugh at themselves. This makes the experience more unique because then they can act like ‘total dorks’ and still feel loved, wanted, and appreciated. Ask any girl if this doesn’t feel damn good. Not just girls, but us guys too. We appreciate those who we can be ‘total dorks’ with, and still be considered amazing. Not only that, but it will make anyone feel more human. Remember that at the end of the night, the week, the month or the year, they may forget what you said to make them laugh, but they will never forget how you made them feel. So throw some lines such as “I swear you’re not being a total loser tonight…”, or have them act silly with you, then accuse THEM of being silly. The point is not to ridiculize them, please DO NOT DO THAT, but rather to encourage them to smile at themselves. Per say, you’re in a relationship, and she goes momentarily crazy on you, do not shout back at her. You’re NOT COMPETING with her (Really, you’re not competing with your girl, that’s lack of manship). Wait for her to relax and show her that you recognize that something is bugging her and you will not leave her side, then have her smile at herself using a sweet line like “I almost had to hide under the bed when you started yelling”. And WATCH how much more she will admire you. You will of course only have enough wisdom and experience to get people to laugh at themselves if you learn to laugh at yourself – so get working on that.

Keep your friends – No one likes to date a loner. Your friends are not there only to back you up, but rather to help you bond stronger with whoever you are. If you’re dating someone, they are of great help (sometimes may be not, in that case, change your friends). If you are just flirting around, your boys or girls are there to back you up. Keep your friends. I know nothing sweeter than a group of girls giving each other emotional support, and in all honesty, I find a woman who helps her friends (with real issues) extremely attractive. I have no doubt women find men who help their friends (with real issues as well) attractive too. Do not give up the time you spend with your friends for anyone. Find a balance between them and whatever else you may be doing.

Keep your passions - Same for your passion. Nothing attracts other higher-level individuals that those who have a passion for something. I believe this is where Mystery’s success lies. I’m not his biggest fan sincerely, much less his method. I do believe that the guy is much greater than the sum of the parts of his method, because he is got a passion, a calling. That is what makes him and many other great people I know so good. They all have this incredible ability of making women feel so special, of making them feel like they are the only woman (or women) in the room. These are what you call ’seducers’. Of course, not all of us are Casanovas. I myself am not a Casanova. I do not want to be one. Why? Because my passion is not women, it’s people. It’s making them think of ways to grow. And this passion has allowed to grow more attractive in their eyes. You do not have to be a Casanova to bring attractive people into your life, but you do need a passion. That should remind you again to not follow the trend or try to achieve someone else’s results, but rather create your own trend and follow it, your results will be unique on their own.

I doubt this list is finished, but for now I’ll cut it out. I hope you liked it and got something out of it.