“…The mouth speaks of what fills the heart.” - Matthew 12:34, The Bible
The Bible tells in the book of Matthew that as Jesus went recruiting his disciples, it took no more than three words to get his followers. “You, follow me”. And so they followed. Now, isn’t that short? When was the last time you used three words on somebody to get them to take action? Think of kids or even you three or four years ago (or even now). Somebody would begin talking to me and after two minutes, I would say ‘How long will this last!?’. Do you remember that? When you felt adults took all the time of the world to tell you something that they could have told you in two minutes… do you remember that? I certainly do. Funny thing is that as I’m growing into an adult, I too tend to make things complicated. I too tend to say unnecessary things to convey something. Though I’m happy to say it’s certainly less than before, I still need to work on it a bit, and don’t we all!? Einstein had it right when he said “any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex, but it takes a touch of genius to move in the opposite direction”.
Say a Lot and Talk Little
Your goal ought to be to say a lot and talk little, not talk a lot and say little. Your goal is to be precise enough to drive them to action. Long gone are the days where you can afford to waste time. You only get to make a first impression once and you gotta make sure you don’t screw up. For instance, you’re invited to a meeting, a conference, or a panel, and you’re asked for your opinion. Right there lies a tremendous opportunity for you to grow your business, network, or meeting someone that can change your life and if I was you, I wouldn’t mess with it. What would you do? Mumble through and give an overused, phony opinion or will you speak passionately and confidently while you let the best of your wisdom come out? It’s a simple concept - you need to be able to say a lot by talking little, and not the other way around. When you meet that good looking girl, you want to be able to convey the best of your personality in few words rather than telling the whole story. When you say “Come over here” you’re communicating more than just wanting her to get closer to you. Depending on how you say it, you could communicate dominance and strength or you can communicate insecurity and weakness.
Taking out the clutter
Almost two years ago I introduced a friend of mine to sales and he in his eagerness to learn, bought a voice recorder and recorded my presentation. To my fortune, that day I made two huge sales right in front of him and I was so proud of myself that I couldn’t wait to listen to the recording and study it. My pride didn’t last long as I began listening because soon enough those annoying “Umms” and “Ahh” and “ehhh” and “something like that’s” were there. Horrible. I’m asking you to become conscious of the words you throw. If you catch yourself saying “Umm”, stop, think over what you will say and then say it. Do not speak until you clearly know what you will say. Don’t feel alone on this, I used to (and still struggle not to) make this mistake all the time, just look at
my videos and you’ll notice.
But clutter doesn’t only mean “umms” and “kindas”, it also means all the unnecessary words you throw around. Now it’s not just a matter of annoying noises, but a matter of preparation. Will Smith has a great quote “Always be prepared, so you don’t HAVE to get prepared”. This means, WRITE down your questions, edit them, rehearse them, and then rehearse them again. Feeling lazy to do that? That may just mean you don’t want it bad enough. Writing and editing this series of articles alone has taken me over 48 hours. I have to be sure I communicate the point across with accuracy - without boring people out of their mind.
Profoundness
“Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.” - Lao Tzu
One of my favorite speakers of all times is the legendary Jim Rohn; his thoughtfulness and fatherly love is shown in simple statements. Statements such as “It’s not so much what I’m earning here, it’s what I’m learning here. It’s not so much what I’m getting here, it’s what I’m becoming’. You can actually watch him explain that here. It takes a lot of thoughtfulness and passion to say such sophisticated statements. It also takes a lot of study. The ideas don’t appear out of the blue, they are collected through a lot of reading and writing (Are you reading at least one book per month?) Learning to inspire is by far one of the best paying skills in today’s market and it will be for a long time. Steve Pavlina is another guy who is thoughtful and profound in his statements. Just look at their success today. Profoundness is not easy to reach, but the results are far more worth than the effort made.
Faith and Belief
Now, please, do not misunderstand. You do not have to be Jim Rohn-like-profound. I use the word ‘profoundness’ but it can be changed by ‘thought-provoking’ or ‘act-provoking’. Jesus’ disciples were so inspired by His teachings and actions that they spread his word after His death, and what a great job did they do! How? They
believed. You don’t have to be super profound, but you DO have to believe. Nothing in the world can make up for real, substantial belief. If you really believe it, it shows. It is ridiculous to communicate something you don’t believe in. Just like not all the training in the world will help you reach fulfilling success unless you believe in what you do; not every tone and word in the world will help you to communicate unless you believe in what you say. Sure, you can get away with it for a bit, but once the lie is uncovered, you’re done.
There is not one specific trait for profoundness. It could be sweet as if it came from a
little girl’s unconditional love or it can come from a professor who uses
coffee and cups to explain life’s meaning.
Voice Inflection
“The sound of the human voice betrays the speaker, for the sound comes from the soul, while words fly off the tongue.” - Unknown
How often do you think about the sound of your voice? Let me tell you, not enough. Just like the belief and the words matter, the inflection in your voice also matters. It’s one of those things we all need to work a little on. Your voice is important. It can bring people closer to you or drive them far away. Yes, it is important. REALLY important. Think of the last time someone’s voice annoyed you so much, you just couldn’t wait to get away from that person. See how important voice is now? With your voice, you can bring people up or bring them down. And again, there is no secret formula. Speaking loud will not bring them up or speaking low will not bring them low. You can whisper and give people something to ponder for the rest of their lives - so drop that non-sense.
The secret to effectiveness is to speak from your heart. Immerse in your feelings and speak from your heart. Let the best of you take over and fear nothing. It can come in a soft-spoken manner or in a loud exclamation. The result is the same - others taking action. The biggest challenge is not to ‘learn’ to speak from your heart, but rather, to
un-learn the need to hide what you really want. If it took you years to shut everything you wanted to say, why not take a bit to unlearn it?
Emphasize the right words
The passion has to be found in your speaking and therefor certain words need to be emphasized. The ‘punch line’ as it’s called is critical. For instance, I have this line I usually throw “I’d be a great boyfriend,
I hope“. And when I say “
I hope” I throw a little funny tone. This humorous statement is much more powerful than “
I hope I’d be a great boyfriend”. The great comedian Henny Youngman became famous with his punchline “Take my wife,
please“. It wasn’t “Please, take my wife”. Out of all things to be lazy about… it should not be language. For - as I said before - they can work miracles.
So practice, practice now. Start recording your voice and go crazy. Sing, recite and say the weirdest things you wouldn’t dare to say in front of others. Do it all while in solitude. I record myself several times before I throw a new line. I recently have adapted the whole ‘Heyey! Giiirl!’ and the responses are mind-blogging. I got it from Will Smith (from the famous Fresh Prince), but if you know me (and my accent) you can only imagine how the combination of that tone and my accent would sound. Record yourself reading. Record yourself speaking. Record yourself modifying your voice. It will feel like a waste of time at the beginning, BUT if you practice for at least 30 minutes weekly, it WILL pay off.
A Final Note
Learning to say a lot while speaking little is one those benefits experts talk about when they say ‘work on yourself’. It’s one of those intangible things that really make a difference wherever you go. Just really think about it - in every occasion that you speak or act, there lies an opportunity to get noticed. Every single statement you make could have a tremendous impact in people’s lives. I would want that, wouldn’t you?
The Art of Speaking Little and Saying a Lot
Linear Mode
