Why don't women know what they want?

[Bob]

The one thing i've always wondered is why women don't know what they want? Throughout my life I've only met maybe 5 women who've known exactly what they want.. most of the women i've known have said that if they could know anything then it would be to know what they want.

Lades could you please explain? i have my own theories but it would be nice to hear from all of you as well

[LINK]

Well... yeah it might be sexist to say this, but most of them are looking for a mate that will take care of their needs. So therefore, they want someone strong, rich, and that can take care of them. (basically) They won't come out and say it, but it's embedded in their mind.
They are still stuck in the mindset of older times, when it was just the male taking care of the female. In today's world, it's both man and woman that have to work evenly just to pay the bills, etc.

[Chikito]

Laura was asking what makes men attracted to women enough for the guy to settle down with them.

This is one of those things.

I have no answer to your question. I live in a house of 6 women and men the only guy. Ive asked them what they look for in a guy, one of my house mates said they are not looking for anything from men besides friendship (shes a UG) and I called her on bullshit. Shes like NO not everything is about finding a man or even a partner (talking about lesbian) i have no intrest at all with hooking up with anyone.

Im like: its a primal instinct that cant be true. The other day we walk past to male tourists, as soon as were outa earshot she says:
"Omg they were soo hot. blah blah"

I thought: "..."

[EvoJ]

Personally I think it is not that they don't know or rather didn't know, but instead that they won't let themselves acknowledge it.

Most women want a rich, powerful, confident, sexy, secure, safe, balls-out, alpha man. This includes being a dick at times and taking the reigns. This includes being able to wup another man's ass and a thousand different things that women are taught to say that they shouldn't like. Because? Because these things are uncivilized. Women are taught that they should look past the guys that treat them like dirt and who are complete assholes and that really will "fight" about it. But you notice how even though women say they don't care about looks they end up with the good looking guy who beat up your fat friend in highschool? Don't worry guys, they don't just lie to us. Women are okay with lying to themselves.

When I see a woman on these forums I think... Oh god, here comes another rendition of "I like the funny guys that have alot of personality" routine. That is not crap (per se) but it IS only the tip. These are the things that women are socially allowed to find attractive. The ones she ISN'T allow to faun all over she may tell herself that she doesn't... but she does.

And don't tell me this isn't true. Every one of us has seen the natural badass loner alpha male mutha-f***er with a woman we just may kill for.

I have a really good female friend (what a suprise right?) and she was telling me... "Oh no, when a guy does something nice for me I don't think of him as a bitch." This guy came over and acted like her bitch all night. Getting her drinks, making her a plate of food, mowing her lawn. I kept pointing it out and she kept saying... "No, he is just being nice, that doesn't make him my bitch." Getting a pack of cards, getting cd's, loaned her money.... Yeah, in one night. I pointed it out again... and again.. and I was really starting to get to her. I could tell.

Then she did something that I thought was rediculous. That evening, she slept with him. But she didn't take him in the back room. No, we all went to sleep (I was staying over) and she brought him into the room I was sleeping in to have sex. I was like... do I get to play? Then I get alot of "no" signals and think WTF??!?!

Then I realized it.

She was trying to show me that nice guys do get laid! She was sleeping with that guy to prove a point. Maybe just prove it to me? No, I think she was also doing it to help prove it to herself. I was flabbergasted.

Now, don't get me wrong. They are both my friends and I am extremely happy that they had some fun... but they have known each other for months and months. This didn't happen out of pent up sexual lust for each other.

Anyway... I forgot what I was writing about with my little tangent there.

EvoJ

[Hector M.]

Sigmund Freud, once said, after all his extensive research into the field of Psychology:

"The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?"

The end.

[Bob]

well put BB... what i really meant was why don't women know what they want in general.. not just in terms of men but in terms of life, etc etc.. career, desires, dreams.. while they have an idea they really don't know what they truly want

[AshleyL]

Originally Posted by BlackBull

Sigmund Freud, once said, after all his extensive research into the field of Psychology:

"The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?"

The end.

^^ there ya go guys, don't get your panties in a bunch trying to figure this stuff out.


In a general sense, I think women want things the WAY that they want them.

Every woman wants something a little different, as we're all individuals-- but women pay very much attention to detail, emotion, nuance, etc... So I don't think it's as much as "WHAT" women want... but how, why, and in which way.

[Hector M.]

Originally Posted by AshleyL

^^ there ya go guys, don't get your panties in a bunch trying to figure this stuff out.


In a general sense, I think women want things the WAY that they want them.

Every woman wants something a little different, as we're all individuals-- but women pay very much attention to detail, emotion, nuance, etc... So I don't think it's as much as "WHAT" women want... but how, why, and in which way.

Cant we all just make love?

[Tom Church]

Do we know what we truely want?

To me, women don't want specific things for more than one moment in time. Their wants and needs change with emotions (which is quite a lot). In order to be desirable to them as much as possible, you have to be dynamic and have the ability to ride the changes with her.

[Daniel Becerra]

Maybe we don't know what we want until we see it.

[ice~]

They want the freedom to fuck.

[NickH]

Originally Posted by ice~

They want the freedom to fuck.

But they cant get it because of the double standards that society places on them.

Women are labeled sluts for it while men get a high five and a shot at the bar.

[Patrick Laffey]

its because they base decisions on emotions and emotions are unstable. guys are more logical so it just seems more obvious for us

[Action]

I'm more concerned with what I want than what women want.
I seriously doubt that anyone knows what they want until they stumble upon it by accident, like Daniel says.
Sure, you can set goals, aim for something, but a whole massive majority of people who achieve their goals remain dissatisfied.

I try to take a buddhist approach to life. Don't aim for anything in particular, simply rejoice in everything you experience, and make decisions in the moment.

[Nicholas Fahrenheit]

Originally Posted by NickH

But they cant get it because of the double standards that society places on them.

Women are labeled sluts for it while men get a high five and a shot at the bar.

Which is why when you're with a girl you have to reassure her that with you she has the freedom to be as slutty as she wants. Tell her shes an animal, tell her to make animal noises as you slap her ass and tell her to take it. Women love to feel dirty when they know that you rent judging them. If they feel sexually safe and unjudged you open a whole world for them. As soon as they know it, you wouldnt believe the torrent of dirty sexual things most of the want to try. So do yourselves a favour next time you're with a girl remind her that you dont think of her as a slut, and that this is a judgment free space, and you know that she ha urges and that she should express them on you.

Then strap yourself in, coz as we all know women are much more sexual than men.

[Bob]

You guys have gotten way off topic here.

If i were to ask you what it's like to live as a woman in this world the first thing you do is relate how women are different than men. This isn't about us men at all. it's about women and not always knowing what they want.

Throughout history in virtually all of society men have been the ones in power and women have been the childbearers and submissive.

In today's society here in america and other nations, women strive to be equal and pay their own way because it's not about women trying to live in a man's world anymore because everybody is equal.

The only thing that differs is the mentality behind it.

The majority of assertive women who do know what they want are few in number in comparison to those that still wish to live by the old ways and settle down with a well to do partner, raise the kids, and be pampered.

Ever since puberty women are told how they should be and should look like and not to be themselves. They're simply told that what they have isn't good enough, not just be people they know but by society and media as a whole.

What happens to the 16 year old girl discovering herself and looking at herself in the mirror everyday. Then imaging her mother getting a nosejob and a few other nips and tucks. What message does that message pass onto the girl who had her mother's nose and now sees that it isn't good enough, that her own mother has to change it because she thinks it's not good enough as well.

As an adult, it varies as well and there are still differences. The key is the mentality that women have on the topic and also the mentality of how men view it as well. Once the view becomes the same and people are viewed as equals it will change. Until then, women will still be indecisive because even if they know what they want they're told that it's not good enough or they don't because they've been raised that way and the media tells them so.

[Slick85]

good looks and great sex... bottom line